The D Word.

Daycare. Gone are the days when Grandma lived blocks away and your child could be dropped off without worry of being shaken or left in a car. My Grandmother lived very close (four blocks) and watched me when my mom went back to work until I became a latch-key kid. It was great. She gave me lots of ice cream and cookies and we watched her Soaps together. We developed a bond that lasted until the day she passed away. I will never forget the time we had together and I wish Elias could have met her. She is and was very special to me.

Nowadays Grandparents are older, live far away and basically have lives. I would love for Elias' Grandparents to drop everything and take care of him but that's not only impossible but selfish.

That said, our parents are being very accomodating and watching Elias until he's six months old. Then when he goes to daycare he'll be a bit older, more aware and starting solid foods. However, that doesn't mean I'm at all more at ease with it. The idea of handing my son to a stranger kills me. I've seen too many of those hidden nanny cams were the nanny is shaking the child. I don't know what I would do to a person who did that to my child, but I'll tell you it wouldn't be pretty. When Elias finally does go to daycare I know that I'll have run extensive background checks, talked to about 500 references and spied on the facility.

Someday I'll have my own practice, hopefully with one of my best friends, and the daycare situation will be a lot easier. Until then I'm going to unclench my fists, stop grinding my teeth and try and find someone to watch Elias who lives up to my standards. As Brad would say, good luck with that.

-C